pessimism
I was told, i was called a pessimist behind my back at work, and rightly so, i won't argue with being a "the glass is half empty" person; yet, when we had the dilemma of updating our lighting desks to the last version that supports the backup files from older software versions, i pointed out, that this might interfere with newer fixture libraries. Guess what happened… But hey, the Boss will get an external expert to fix this for the moment, instead of listen and give us the time to come up with a solution—or send people to trainings, instead of letting them cobble together knowledge.
Why does being called a pessimist bother me? It's true. I see positive things, i notice beauty, grace, joy; i talk about them, i don't force them in the foreground like other people seem to do, and in that act, negate the ugly things.
That's the best i can articulate at the moment.
It bothers me, that some people don't seem to be able to make a definitive statement. In this particular case, it was a podcast, in which both hosts always put a "kind of" before a statement. The moment i wanted to shout at the program was, when one host said "My mother kind of died." Kind of died? Perhaps, she put a lid on a chapter of her life, and declared the person who lived through it dead, was my first impression, which was negated with an anecdote from the Mother's funeral. She isn't kind of dead, all life has vacated that body, which has been burned to a pile of ash; she has died. And now i notice it in the speech patterns of some colleagues, the Nieces, and even myself.
The Wife bought a pair of earrings, and they are ugly as shit and make her look like a Grandma and i have no idea how to tell her.
Read an issue of Dossier[^dossier] about how the system for adult care gets exploited here… It's a shame how we treat people who need help, how we find ways to exploit their needs for other peoples gain.